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Testimonies
Members can add testimonies. Register here or Login here.MY OWN TESTIMONY DELIVERED FROM DEPRESSION
I have been a bit hesitant in writing my own testimony. Because it may seem to give the impression that I am some kind of super Christian, also because of the Stories of testimonies I tell, and I feel it gives to much attention to me. I don't in any way intend this. I give the Lord all my thanks for my salvation and help in my time of trouble. PRAISE THE LORD. But I can only tell it how it happened and has someone keeps telling me, people can accept what the Lord as done for me, how he as used and blessed me. Or simply not accept it, or even not like it. but I have been encouraged to tell it so I will. Also it may help others with depression.
I was born to a household that believed in the Lord but that's as far as it went. Apart from my grandparents who were a bit more believing.The only one that really believed was my great grammar, she lived next door to me. My great grandmother gave me the four gospels in a separate individual form. Also a very large family bible, which I read. (I have always been a big bookworm.) So I read all the gospels and the bible at a very young age. So I believed in Jesus from that time on. When I was ever in trouble, I would pray to God, but that's as far as it went. Was I then a Christian from that very young age? Because I believed in the Lord I don't know?. None of the family went to church, well that's the background.
I was now 40, and just lived as most people do. I believed deep down but that's all, just involved in the world. With only a passing thought about God, and that was it. Now for reasons I am not going into. I fell into a depression. I have always been a happy guy. I never thought I would get that. Impossible. It could never happen. But it did. It started with a dream when I fell ill with flu and I thought I was going to die. As I watched TV, I would just start to cry for no reason and I was full of anxiety. I had lost all my worldly joy, everything was black. I used to enjoy the birds singing but now this was gone. My stomach was turning over and I would stop in bed most of the day. There was no reason to get up for, I felt so down and weepy. I kept on thinking I was going to die. And started to think about all the things I had done, that the Lord would not be pleased about. I kept on thinking what can I say to him when I face him.
One night I decided that only Jesus can help me. So I told my wife that for the very first time, I was going to go to church. She told me that I could go, but no way was she going to go. She had had a Pentecostal upbringing and forced to go every Sunday. She felt very strong about it, said they were all Hippocrates. Wore fancy dressers and hats on Sunday to church, yet called each other behind there backs. She said you can go but I will not. But praise the Lord, he had other plans for her. And he stepped in and sorted her out. (Will tell her testimony later.)
So off I went, it was Sunday, it had started to rain and I drove to the local c of.e. Church. I went to the main door and knocked very loud, but nobody answered.I knocked, banged and banged, but still no one came. So I gave up and decided to go to another church just round the corner. It was a Methodist but I did not know what that meant. The top man was at the door, he greeted me and shook my hand. I went in and sat down. But after a few minutes I felt unsettled. They had a huge organ playing that sounded like the death march, and the place was full of old people, none my age. I thought I am not going to get any help here so I went back out. The same man who had greeted me shook my hand again as I left. I had only been in five min's, he must have thought I was mad. I when back to the first church again in such a state, I needed help. This time I was determined to get an answer. So I bashed and bashed the door of the church with all my power. Finally, the door opened. A young man stood there and said “what do you want?” I said “what do you think I want, I want to come in to pray”. Now he took one look at me. Probably seeing the look in my eyes, that he said “You don't want to come in here. It’s only a few old women. You need to go to Christ church, the one I go to”. He gave me directions and I eventually found it. It looked like a picture xmas card. I knew this was the one.But has I walked up to it I lost my nerve, and turned round. But a man who became a good friend, shouted me back and took me in. I just sat at the back and felt very tearful, wishing I could be like the other people in there pure. There were two vicars- I waited till the end, and approached the younger of the vicars he was the curate. I did not know what this meant. I told him I needed help, from God. He said “do you want to be a Christian”. I said “of cause I do!”, and he prayed for me. I said the sinner’s prayer and accepted Jesus into my life. He then gave me a bible as a present, I took it and went home. That night I read a bit of it, but I thought to myself, it won’t do any good I already know it pretty well, then I fell asleep.
Well the next morning when I got up I got a shock, everything was new, the birds were singing again. But I felt funny inside, a little floating feeling, and all the trees, and the sky felt so different, so blue, so beautiful beyond words. For a full week when I walked, I could hardly feel my feet on the ground, it felt like I was walking on a soft cloud, soft sponge beneath my feet.But the depression came back,in the background. not as bad as it was, not like before, just intermittent. When I prayed it would lift from me, but come back the next day A little weaker, it was gradually lifting. but I think it took about three months before it went completely. I went to the c of e for every meeting they had, I read a lot of Christian books. One was 9. o clock in the morning, which talks about the baptism of the Spirit, and I wanted to hear tongues. I have always been a doubting Thomas so I thought if I could hear them, it would help me believe. so in the mornings I would go to an elim church Pentecostal. and there I heard the tongues for the very first time.Now I was told that all my sins had been forgiven, when I said the sinner’s prayer, but I still felt dirty before the Lord. I felt unclean in his presence. Also I still had bouts of anxiety, it would leave me when I prayed but still came back the next day, but it was weakening very slowly.Because I felt so unclean spiritually, (I was not working at the time). So I would stop up very late till 2 or 3 in the morning, praying for hours and hours and hours. asking for Gods forgiveness. That was all I wanted his forgiveness. I read the bible and prayed like this for about 3 months. Every night repenting of my past sins.
Then one day at the elim church, the pastor who did not know my situation gave a message from God. He said “you have been seeking my face, AND IN 3 DAYS I WILL REVEAL MYSELF TO YOU”. I knew straight away it was for me. Because every night for all that time, I had wept and cried out to the Lord for forgiveness. I thought wow, will I see him in 3 days. Bang on 3 days, very late that night, I was praying in my front room, knelt down on the floor, when I felt a wind come into the room. I looked round to see where it had come from. And I felt a very light tingling on my head, and the wind blew gently on my face. Now I knew something was happening, but to be careful. I commanded in Jesus name, if this is not from the Lord then it must go. I did this again, but the tingling on my head came stronger. It started to make me cry, and I felt as though someone was stood behind me, washing me clean with a scrubbing brush. I remembered the words that came into my head, Jesus said unless I wash you, you are not clean. from that night on I felt clean before the Lord, and I never had to pray for that again. Now the power on my head was coming down stronger, so once again I told it stop. If it was not from the Lord, in Jesus name. But if it was from him let me have it. When I said this, it came so strong that I started to cry and shake. I had never experienced this before, or any thing like it. It went though my body from head to toe. It felt that every atom in my body was being re-arranged and vibrating with energy. It came pouring down on me. It was like an electric power waves of energy going though me. It got so intense that I thought I was going to die and thoughts came into my head. THIS COULD KILL YOU, WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO?. I looked up and said I don’t care if it does, if it’s from you Lord let me have it - choose what happens. Then it came even stronger, then I shouted out THANK YOU LORD. When I said that, I can’t describe how powerful it came down on me. So much so, that I finally had to ask the Lord to stop. Immediatly it stopped, I was still shaking and trembling and weeping. I gatherd my self together and went to bed. Then I did a bad thing the next morning when I got up, I doubted the whole experience, I thought it must have been all psychological- with my scientific mind I thought that was probably what had happened to me. Well the Lord had other plans, he was soon to show me that it was real in a powerful way, also another baptism was to come.A baptism of fire and powerful displays of his power, evangelism, healings and deliverances. As some of my testimonies that I have put in show.
The following week, the vicar came to see me. He brought me tapes teaching on prayer. He asked me to listen to them. Then asked me to come down to church one night and give a talk about it. I told him of the experience I had just had, but he did not seem to be that took up with it. I was asking him really for help to explain to me what had happened to me. I had only been a Christian a few months, I thought he would know all about it. Unfortunately he did not make any comment, or advice.I studied the tapes and went down to the church, it was in the evening in the little back room. I was very nervous as I had never spoken in public before. I sat in the pews, the people were gathered in the back room waiting for me. I told my wife to leave me as I wanted to pray on my own before I went in.My wife is very quite and shy, and I had to get strong with her to make go in alone, finally she went in. Has I sat there on my own, I looked at the altar at the front. I prayed please Lord give me the Holy Spirit to give me the strength to do this. Before I even got the first few words out, a wind came from the front from the alter and blew on me just like in my first experience. It gently pushed me back into the pew, and I felt that same filling of power as I had felt the night the Lord visited and filled me. It was so powerful it took my breath away. I got up and felt very wobbly in my legs, drunk in the Spirit. I managed to walk in the room to the congregation and began my talk, it went very well. I have always been able to explain things and talk, when I had finished the vicar said a prayer. Then other people said a prayer. I thought oh my goodness I should also pray, but I had never done that in front of anyone before. I was terrified !, but I forced myself to drop on my knees and pray. The only thing I could think of was to say, Lord please send your Holy Spirit down on us please and fill us.Then I got a shock, because that’s exactly what happened. The Holy Spirit fell, and people started to worship so much, that it seemed like the Church of England had turned Pentecostal. I had never seen this before. The lady at the side of me (Ann) was completely lost in praise, she stood up with her arms in the air lost in worship. The vicar’s son was sat next to me, he learned over to me and said “you have made me think again”. I could only presume that he never thought it was a reality. Perhaps he only went to church because of his father, and as a religious act only. The Lord had touched him though, because a few days later, he bust out in tongues and was baptised in the Holy Ghost. While all this praise and worship was taking place, I was looking round wondering what was going off, the people here don’t do this (like this was happening).Then the vicar shot out of his seat very upset and angry, he shouted to Ann to stop worshiping like that. He really lased into her and gave her a dressing down. He said “you should not go off like that”, then he tuned to me and told me that I could not pray for the Holy Spirit to come down on us. Only he could ask for that,because he was the vicar. he told me off. I think he was upset by the reaction of the people as the Spirit fell. He then finished the meeting, because he wanted to see an out of the body experience program on TV. I was flabbergasted, I thought that was what every Christian wanted, The Lord to fall on us. I could not believe what he had said. All the people stood outside and were upset with him they had wanted to carry on. Some was very upset, this was the first encounter with the church that mystified me. I was to find out this was not to be the last. For example, later on when we were having the house meetings with people that we had led to the Lord. (when the testimonies that I have already put in Task Jesus began to happen.) I told a senior member of the same church, all the wonderful things that were happening, conversions and some healings. But instead of being pleased to hear about these things, I was told that we could not have a house meeting and worship the Lord without the vicar’s permission.! (most of these people did not even go to his church).
Later that evening, even then as a doubting Thomas I asked my friend Ann if it was what I had said in my prayer, that had induced her to worship like that. She said “no it was not” and she had not even been listening to what I said in my prayer. She had her mind on something else, when she suddenly felt she felt the Holy Spirit fall on her, which made her worship so strongly. She could not understand why the vicar had reacted like that to people lost in worship.That night as I fell asleep, all the way though the night even in my sleep I could feel a power like a vibration, a trembling flow though me. When I woke up in the morning it was still there, it was like when the Lord first filled me a few days before, only more gentle. I could still feel it gently in the background for years, that was when the Lord told me (please see my testimony a conversion by the power of God falling down).that all I had to do was put my hands on people and pray. So that’s what I did whenever I got the chance. As soon as I held their hands they would feel a power heat, tingling and vibration flow into them. Then they would usually start to weep, more like a washing crying etc. Then they would feel different, peace, love, etc. Some then turned to the lord, but not all, but they did all start then to believe. So our house meetings began to grow and things started to happen. As I have written in my other testimonies. I was so excited about all these things happening, because when I laid hands on people these things happened. I was amazed I had difficulty taking it all in. With been such a young Christian I thought that this was the norm. I was to find out the hard way that it would cause some problems for me.
THE FIRE FALLS
Now one evening as we was in my house worshiping (the house was full). I started to pray, and I said the first thing that came into my mind. We sometimes sing that song let the fire fall in Pentecostal Churches. I also knew that the symbol for the Holy Spirit was fire, so I prayed to God to send the Holy Fire down to fill us.I did not fully realise what I had asked for, the bible says he will baptise with the Holy Spirit and with fire. I found out after, that a famous theologian said that in the Greek this was a separate baptism, that the Greek allows for two not one. I also knew that the initial outpouring of the Spirit at Pentecost was like tongues of fire on their heads, also frist with a mighty wind. Jesus also said the wind will blow were it will ,meaning the Holy Sprit to nicodemus. John 3:8. I always thought it was symbolic, but now i know that it is real. many people have since told me about this wind blowing on them.
I did not think too much about that prayer till the next day. My friend Peter said “since you prayed that prayer my back burns like a fire when I pray or worship”. We were soon to find out that he had been given a powerful anointing from the Lord. A few days later I forgot about it and was driving with my daughter in my car praising our heads off. When suddenly I felt a warm little heat in my belly. It just felt like a candle had been lit in side me flickering. Just like a candle wavering side to side in my belly. I thought what the heck, is that.!!! Then I suddenly knew it was the Holy Spirit inside me.When I started to pray worship or even think about the Lord, it would flare up like a fire inside my belly. Sometimes at night it would seem like two tongues of fire would flame up on my head. Also people I held hands to pray for, would have they hands burn like hot coals.
I could not understand what was happening to me, I was only a few months old in the Lord. First the filling of power, now this. I went to all my Christian friends and pastors. and visiting preachers to see if they could explain what was happening. I had heard them preach on this same subject for hours in Pentecostal Churches. Now when they had finished preaching on how we should receive the baptism of fire. They had used all the texts to back it up from the bible. I would go and talk to them. But instead of giving me advice, they would not try to help at all. I don’t think they believed me. Each time a preacher would visit the church (Assemblies of God Pentecostal) not one off them could offer any advice or information. They did not want to communicate with me. One even actually stepped a few feet backwards away from me. I said to my wife, he has been preaching on this subject for almost an hour. Yet when I tell him I have received what he said we should receive, he does not want to know. I was perplexed, I don’t think that they believe what they preach. It seems that they just preach to the gallery. So I got no help. One pastor even said to me “what will you do when the fire leaves you ? will you still worship God, when it goes away?. just forget about it". Well the Lord told me in prophecy that it would never ever leave me. I still have it 22 years on to this day. Finally I did get some answers, I had a friend a Christian lady who was very Spirit filled, who I considered to be my mentor. I had asked her before about this matter. But in the past she had kept very quite about it. But later she finally told me that she too had the same fire inside her. but she didn’t want to tell me before, because she thought that I was not ready. I wish she had done when I first asked, because of the trials and pain I had just gone though. Also then one by one, other Christians began to tell me they had the same thing. How I wish they had all told me before. to save me a lot of heartache.The fire did die down to a smoulder for the last few years because everybody I knew has moved away or got married and moved on. I am retired now, so I don’t see anybody at all. Then I found Task Jesus, and realised that I could perhaps encourage others by writing my testimonies. So I could still do some work that way for the Lord. I don’t know if the anointing that I received is still on me but the other day I prayed for my next door neighbour, and I felt the Lord fall on us the way that he used to. Also because of communicating with Christians and sharing about the Lord on this site, my mind is always on the Lord.
The fire has now returned to a full fire again, and things are starting to happen again, so who knows what is going to happen.Next I will tell how the evil one tried to stop me from working for the Lord and nearly made me fall away, but how the Lord stepped in and saved me.
I was born to a household that believed in the Lord but that's as far as it went. Apart from my grandparents who were a bit more believing.The only one that really believed was my great grammar, she lived next door to me. My great grandmother gave me the four gospels in a separate individual form. Also a very large family bible, which I read. (I have always been a big bookworm.) So I read all the gospels and the bible at a very young age. So I believed in Jesus from that time on. When I was ever in trouble, I would pray to God, but that's as far as it went. Was I then a Christian from that very young age? Because I believed in the Lord I don't know?. None of the family went to church, well that's the background.
I was now 40, and just lived as most people do. I believed deep down but that's all, just involved in the world. With only a passing thought about God, and that was it. Now for reasons I am not going into. I fell into a depression. I have always been a happy guy. I never thought I would get that. Impossible. It could never happen. But it did. It started with a dream when I fell ill with flu and I thought I was going to die. As I watched TV, I would just start to cry for no reason and I was full of anxiety. I had lost all my worldly joy, everything was black. I used to enjoy the birds singing but now this was gone. My stomach was turning over and I would stop in bed most of the day. There was no reason to get up for, I felt so down and weepy. I kept on thinking I was going to die. And started to think about all the things I had done, that the Lord would not be pleased about. I kept on thinking what can I say to him when I face him.
One night I decided that only Jesus can help me. So I told my wife that for the very first time, I was going to go to church. She told me that I could go, but no way was she going to go. She had had a Pentecostal upbringing and forced to go every Sunday. She felt very strong about it, said they were all Hippocrates. Wore fancy dressers and hats on Sunday to church, yet called each other behind there backs. She said you can go but I will not. But praise the Lord, he had other plans for her. And he stepped in and sorted her out. (Will tell her testimony later.)
So off I went, it was Sunday, it had started to rain and I drove to the local c of.e. Church. I went to the main door and knocked very loud, but nobody answered.I knocked, banged and banged, but still no one came. So I gave up and decided to go to another church just round the corner. It was a Methodist but I did not know what that meant. The top man was at the door, he greeted me and shook my hand. I went in and sat down. But after a few minutes I felt unsettled. They had a huge organ playing that sounded like the death march, and the place was full of old people, none my age. I thought I am not going to get any help here so I went back out. The same man who had greeted me shook my hand again as I left. I had only been in five min's, he must have thought I was mad. I when back to the first church again in such a state, I needed help. This time I was determined to get an answer. So I bashed and bashed the door of the church with all my power. Finally, the door opened. A young man stood there and said “what do you want?” I said “what do you think I want, I want to come in to pray”. Now he took one look at me. Probably seeing the look in my eyes, that he said “You don't want to come in here. It’s only a few old women. You need to go to Christ church, the one I go to”. He gave me directions and I eventually found it. It looked like a picture xmas card. I knew this was the one.But has I walked up to it I lost my nerve, and turned round. But a man who became a good friend, shouted me back and took me in. I just sat at the back and felt very tearful, wishing I could be like the other people in there pure. There were two vicars- I waited till the end, and approached the younger of the vicars he was the curate. I did not know what this meant. I told him I needed help, from God. He said “do you want to be a Christian”. I said “of cause I do!”, and he prayed for me. I said the sinner’s prayer and accepted Jesus into my life. He then gave me a bible as a present, I took it and went home. That night I read a bit of it, but I thought to myself, it won’t do any good I already know it pretty well, then I fell asleep.
Well the next morning when I got up I got a shock, everything was new, the birds were singing again. But I felt funny inside, a little floating feeling, and all the trees, and the sky felt so different, so blue, so beautiful beyond words. For a full week when I walked, I could hardly feel my feet on the ground, it felt like I was walking on a soft cloud, soft sponge beneath my feet.But the depression came back,in the background. not as bad as it was, not like before, just intermittent. When I prayed it would lift from me, but come back the next day A little weaker, it was gradually lifting. but I think it took about three months before it went completely. I went to the c of e for every meeting they had, I read a lot of Christian books. One was 9. o clock in the morning, which talks about the baptism of the Spirit, and I wanted to hear tongues. I have always been a doubting Thomas so I thought if I could hear them, it would help me believe. so in the mornings I would go to an elim church Pentecostal. and there I heard the tongues for the very first time.Now I was told that all my sins had been forgiven, when I said the sinner’s prayer, but I still felt dirty before the Lord. I felt unclean in his presence. Also I still had bouts of anxiety, it would leave me when I prayed but still came back the next day, but it was weakening very slowly.Because I felt so unclean spiritually, (I was not working at the time). So I would stop up very late till 2 or 3 in the morning, praying for hours and hours and hours. asking for Gods forgiveness. That was all I wanted his forgiveness. I read the bible and prayed like this for about 3 months. Every night repenting of my past sins.
Then one day at the elim church, the pastor who did not know my situation gave a message from God. He said “you have been seeking my face, AND IN 3 DAYS I WILL REVEAL MYSELF TO YOU”. I knew straight away it was for me. Because every night for all that time, I had wept and cried out to the Lord for forgiveness. I thought wow, will I see him in 3 days. Bang on 3 days, very late that night, I was praying in my front room, knelt down on the floor, when I felt a wind come into the room. I looked round to see where it had come from. And I felt a very light tingling on my head, and the wind blew gently on my face. Now I knew something was happening, but to be careful. I commanded in Jesus name, if this is not from the Lord then it must go. I did this again, but the tingling on my head came stronger. It started to make me cry, and I felt as though someone was stood behind me, washing me clean with a scrubbing brush. I remembered the words that came into my head, Jesus said unless I wash you, you are not clean. from that night on I felt clean before the Lord, and I never had to pray for that again. Now the power on my head was coming down stronger, so once again I told it stop. If it was not from the Lord, in Jesus name. But if it was from him let me have it. When I said this, it came so strong that I started to cry and shake. I had never experienced this before, or any thing like it. It went though my body from head to toe. It felt that every atom in my body was being re-arranged and vibrating with energy. It came pouring down on me. It was like an electric power waves of energy going though me. It got so intense that I thought I was going to die and thoughts came into my head. THIS COULD KILL YOU, WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO?. I looked up and said I don’t care if it does, if it’s from you Lord let me have it - choose what happens. Then it came even stronger, then I shouted out THANK YOU LORD. When I said that, I can’t describe how powerful it came down on me. So much so, that I finally had to ask the Lord to stop. Immediatly it stopped, I was still shaking and trembling and weeping. I gatherd my self together and went to bed. Then I did a bad thing the next morning when I got up, I doubted the whole experience, I thought it must have been all psychological- with my scientific mind I thought that was probably what had happened to me. Well the Lord had other plans, he was soon to show me that it was real in a powerful way, also another baptism was to come.A baptism of fire and powerful displays of his power, evangelism, healings and deliverances. As some of my testimonies that I have put in show.
The following week, the vicar came to see me. He brought me tapes teaching on prayer. He asked me to listen to them. Then asked me to come down to church one night and give a talk about it. I told him of the experience I had just had, but he did not seem to be that took up with it. I was asking him really for help to explain to me what had happened to me. I had only been a Christian a few months, I thought he would know all about it. Unfortunately he did not make any comment, or advice.I studied the tapes and went down to the church, it was in the evening in the little back room. I was very nervous as I had never spoken in public before. I sat in the pews, the people were gathered in the back room waiting for me. I told my wife to leave me as I wanted to pray on my own before I went in.My wife is very quite and shy, and I had to get strong with her to make go in alone, finally she went in. Has I sat there on my own, I looked at the altar at the front. I prayed please Lord give me the Holy Spirit to give me the strength to do this. Before I even got the first few words out, a wind came from the front from the alter and blew on me just like in my first experience. It gently pushed me back into the pew, and I felt that same filling of power as I had felt the night the Lord visited and filled me. It was so powerful it took my breath away. I got up and felt very wobbly in my legs, drunk in the Spirit. I managed to walk in the room to the congregation and began my talk, it went very well. I have always been able to explain things and talk, when I had finished the vicar said a prayer. Then other people said a prayer. I thought oh my goodness I should also pray, but I had never done that in front of anyone before. I was terrified !, but I forced myself to drop on my knees and pray. The only thing I could think of was to say, Lord please send your Holy Spirit down on us please and fill us.Then I got a shock, because that’s exactly what happened. The Holy Spirit fell, and people started to worship so much, that it seemed like the Church of England had turned Pentecostal. I had never seen this before. The lady at the side of me (Ann) was completely lost in praise, she stood up with her arms in the air lost in worship. The vicar’s son was sat next to me, he learned over to me and said “you have made me think again”. I could only presume that he never thought it was a reality. Perhaps he only went to church because of his father, and as a religious act only. The Lord had touched him though, because a few days later, he bust out in tongues and was baptised in the Holy Ghost. While all this praise and worship was taking place, I was looking round wondering what was going off, the people here don’t do this (like this was happening).Then the vicar shot out of his seat very upset and angry, he shouted to Ann to stop worshiping like that. He really lased into her and gave her a dressing down. He said “you should not go off like that”, then he tuned to me and told me that I could not pray for the Holy Spirit to come down on us. Only he could ask for that,because he was the vicar. he told me off. I think he was upset by the reaction of the people as the Spirit fell. He then finished the meeting, because he wanted to see an out of the body experience program on TV. I was flabbergasted, I thought that was what every Christian wanted, The Lord to fall on us. I could not believe what he had said. All the people stood outside and were upset with him they had wanted to carry on. Some was very upset, this was the first encounter with the church that mystified me. I was to find out this was not to be the last. For example, later on when we were having the house meetings with people that we had led to the Lord. (when the testimonies that I have already put in Task Jesus began to happen.) I told a senior member of the same church, all the wonderful things that were happening, conversions and some healings. But instead of being pleased to hear about these things, I was told that we could not have a house meeting and worship the Lord without the vicar’s permission.! (most of these people did not even go to his church).
Later that evening, even then as a doubting Thomas I asked my friend Ann if it was what I had said in my prayer, that had induced her to worship like that. She said “no it was not” and she had not even been listening to what I said in my prayer. She had her mind on something else, when she suddenly felt she felt the Holy Spirit fall on her, which made her worship so strongly. She could not understand why the vicar had reacted like that to people lost in worship.That night as I fell asleep, all the way though the night even in my sleep I could feel a power like a vibration, a trembling flow though me. When I woke up in the morning it was still there, it was like when the Lord first filled me a few days before, only more gentle. I could still feel it gently in the background for years, that was when the Lord told me (please see my testimony a conversion by the power of God falling down).that all I had to do was put my hands on people and pray. So that’s what I did whenever I got the chance. As soon as I held their hands they would feel a power heat, tingling and vibration flow into them. Then they would usually start to weep, more like a washing crying etc. Then they would feel different, peace, love, etc. Some then turned to the lord, but not all, but they did all start then to believe. So our house meetings began to grow and things started to happen. As I have written in my other testimonies. I was so excited about all these things happening, because when I laid hands on people these things happened. I was amazed I had difficulty taking it all in. With been such a young Christian I thought that this was the norm. I was to find out the hard way that it would cause some problems for me.
THE FIRE FALLS
Now one evening as we was in my house worshiping (the house was full). I started to pray, and I said the first thing that came into my mind. We sometimes sing that song let the fire fall in Pentecostal Churches. I also knew that the symbol for the Holy Spirit was fire, so I prayed to God to send the Holy Fire down to fill us.I did not fully realise what I had asked for, the bible says he will baptise with the Holy Spirit and with fire. I found out after, that a famous theologian said that in the Greek this was a separate baptism, that the Greek allows for two not one. I also knew that the initial outpouring of the Spirit at Pentecost was like tongues of fire on their heads, also frist with a mighty wind. Jesus also said the wind will blow were it will ,meaning the Holy Sprit to nicodemus. John 3:8. I always thought it was symbolic, but now i know that it is real. many people have since told me about this wind blowing on them.
I did not think too much about that prayer till the next day. My friend Peter said “since you prayed that prayer my back burns like a fire when I pray or worship”. We were soon to find out that he had been given a powerful anointing from the Lord. A few days later I forgot about it and was driving with my daughter in my car praising our heads off. When suddenly I felt a warm little heat in my belly. It just felt like a candle had been lit in side me flickering. Just like a candle wavering side to side in my belly. I thought what the heck, is that.!!! Then I suddenly knew it was the Holy Spirit inside me.When I started to pray worship or even think about the Lord, it would flare up like a fire inside my belly. Sometimes at night it would seem like two tongues of fire would flame up on my head. Also people I held hands to pray for, would have they hands burn like hot coals.
I could not understand what was happening to me, I was only a few months old in the Lord. First the filling of power, now this. I went to all my Christian friends and pastors. and visiting preachers to see if they could explain what was happening. I had heard them preach on this same subject for hours in Pentecostal Churches. Now when they had finished preaching on how we should receive the baptism of fire. They had used all the texts to back it up from the bible. I would go and talk to them. But instead of giving me advice, they would not try to help at all. I don’t think they believed me. Each time a preacher would visit the church (Assemblies of God Pentecostal) not one off them could offer any advice or information. They did not want to communicate with me. One even actually stepped a few feet backwards away from me. I said to my wife, he has been preaching on this subject for almost an hour. Yet when I tell him I have received what he said we should receive, he does not want to know. I was perplexed, I don’t think that they believe what they preach. It seems that they just preach to the gallery. So I got no help. One pastor even said to me “what will you do when the fire leaves you ? will you still worship God, when it goes away?. just forget about it". Well the Lord told me in prophecy that it would never ever leave me. I still have it 22 years on to this day. Finally I did get some answers, I had a friend a Christian lady who was very Spirit filled, who I considered to be my mentor. I had asked her before about this matter. But in the past she had kept very quite about it. But later she finally told me that she too had the same fire inside her. but she didn’t want to tell me before, because she thought that I was not ready. I wish she had done when I first asked, because of the trials and pain I had just gone though. Also then one by one, other Christians began to tell me they had the same thing. How I wish they had all told me before. to save me a lot of heartache.The fire did die down to a smoulder for the last few years because everybody I knew has moved away or got married and moved on. I am retired now, so I don’t see anybody at all. Then I found Task Jesus, and realised that I could perhaps encourage others by writing my testimonies. So I could still do some work that way for the Lord. I don’t know if the anointing that I received is still on me but the other day I prayed for my next door neighbour, and I felt the Lord fall on us the way that he used to. Also because of communicating with Christians and sharing about the Lord on this site, my mind is always on the Lord.
The fire has now returned to a full fire again, and things are starting to happen again, so who knows what is going to happen.Next I will tell how the evil one tried to stop me from working for the Lord and nearly made me fall away, but how the Lord stepped in and saved me.
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